Born on a rotten day horoscope

Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces are the drama kings and queens.

Self-destructive and manipulative, this awful bunch tries to control the rest of us through emotional blackmail. Water seeks not only its lowest level but yours as well. These characters will stop at nothing to find your weak spot and pick at it until you crack. As for the qualities and polarities, the following comparisons will give you enough to get started. Traditional astrology defines Cardinal as the initiator and leader. Rotten-truth translation: a bossy, pot-stirring meddler. Aries, Cancer, Capricorn, and Libra are the Cardinal signs.

The Fixed quality is defined as stable and persistent.

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Translation: a stubborn, exasperating bore. Mutable signs are described as flexible and adaptable. Translation: an inconsistent, self-delusional escapist. Gemini, Sagittarius, Pisces, and Virgo are the Mutable signs. Finally, each sign is assigned a Masculine outgoing or Feminine receptive polarity. The rotten truth about this facet of the sun-sign personality is that masculine is an aggressor and feminine is an emotional manipulator. How does it work? How can a person be flighty, stubborn, and aggressive?

Water Bearers can change horses midstream. They can have twenty lovers in a year. Each sign has its own chapter, and each chapter is divided into the following subsections:. Regardless of gender, age, or sexual preference, natives of the individual sun signs share some common bad behaviors. But before you decide to make it permanent, be warned. You could go to sleep with Betty Crocker and wake up with Lizzie Borden. Or fall for a character who color-codes your closet and tapes a lovemaking schedule on the bedroom door.

Yes, this is all about you. Anyone reading it will soon discover that you are a force of nature not to be trifled with, in or out of the sack. Ever wonder why your parents were so weird and your siblings so selfish, whiny, and mean? Find out here and also how to deal with that nutty bunch into which you did not ask to be born. Life at the office.

How to handle churlish coworkers, cover your ass, and save your job. Tips for surviving the four worst behaviors of each sign e. A list that may save your sanity, or at least buy you enough time to leave town. Element: Fire. Quality: Cardinal. The only thing an Aries is qualified to lead is a chorus of kindergartners singing the Barney song. Aries, first sign of the zodiac, resides in the House of Self. Astrology textbooks describe the Ram as a charming, enthusiastic, natural-born leader who gleefully rushes through life with tremendous joie de vivre.

The truth is, this bossy, egotistical motormouth is as self-absorbed as a two-year-old, and has a me-complex the size of Texas. In Aries, Mars gives courage, determination, energy, passion, and ambition. He also bestows temperament, ego, and impulsive action. Just like Yosemite Sam, the typical Ram barrels through life daring anyone to cross his or her path.

Jumping up and down is optional. Aries are reactive, not reasonable.

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By refusing to think before they act, Rams often ruin their chances for happiness by making wild assumptions without gathering all the facts. Being born without the humility gene has negated their ability to admit mistakes. Prove they are wrong, and they will react like that toddler who says, Am not, then shrugs his baby shoulders and walks away.

Of course, I am. Passionate, idealistic, and sentimental, the Aries man is part hero, part child, no matter what his age. You can knock him down, but he will always bounce back. And, for as long as he loves you, he will be faithful, sexy, and attentive.

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Aries men are in love with love. The appeal is in the art of romance and the thrill of the chase, not your charming smile. Some astrologers compare an Aries man to a knight in shining armor. However, you are just as likely to get run down by his charging steed as scooped up in a pair of loving arms. Sir Lancelot may have been bold and honest, but he was also a royal pain in the ass, all Aries traits.

The Ram fears mediocrity more than death. He would rather be the biggest jerk in town than just another anonymous working slob. He is subjective, bossy, and has a caustic wit he flings with careless abandon. He takes pride in being more self-centered than Scorpio and more obtuse than Taurus. Especially when he is wrong. Male Rams come in two types.

Born on a Rotten Day by Hazel Dixon-Cooper - Read Online

Bold, brash, and ready for action or shy, quiet, and ready for action. He may come on all Aw shucks and toe shuffles, like Aries Dennis Quaid, but under that poker face, or enigmatic smile, his brain synapses are firing at 1, per minute, concentrating on the best way to get you into his bed in the shortest possible time. Aries Hugh Hefner, the flip, hip, big daddy of hedonism, is still alive and well, and still the quintessential bad boy at seventy-six. Remember all of this before you buy your wedding dress. After the ceremony, he will expect you to worship the ground he makes you crawl on while he declares his need for freedom.

He will require you to have the house sparkling, the grass mowed, and the cars washed, all before he gets home from his latest adventure. This man chases the ideal. He wants the adoration of Mommy and the ethereal qualities of a fairy princess, all wrapped up in the figure of a Playboy centerfold. He is restless, fidgety, and has frequent headaches.

Fix-It with the plumbing. Ram communicates by temper tantrum. He will smash the glasses and put his fist through the wall one minute, then want to screw your brains out the next. Your favorite Martian will start a little war to have an excuse to slam out of the house and stay out until all hours.

Dark Side of the Zodiac Signs

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In love with an obtuse Taurus, drunk Pisces or hot-headed Aries?. Fed up with whining relatives, and backstabbing co-workers?. Anecdotes and quotes involving famous characters from both fiction and life illustrate various churlish, and predictable, behaviours. See details.